"Hopelessness is a Luxury"
During the January 10th Hidden Brain podcast, social psychologist Phillip Atiba Goff proclaimed that “hopelessness is a luxury.” Dr. Goff is cofounder of the Center for Policing Equity and was speaking about hopelessness in the context of social change. A necessary ingredient for activism is hope—the belief that one’s efforts can result in change.
The same could be said of personal change. Unless your life is a fairy tale, maintaining a hopeful attitude is essential for keeping despair at bay. In fact, experts believe that hope is fundamental to our basic well-being.
But hope isn’t just a passive activity. Wishing for something is not the same as working for something. Hope without action is simply magical thinking; hope paired with action can get us to where we want to go.
Hope vs. Optimism
We sometimes confuse hope with optimism. Hope is rooted in a sense of agency whereas optimism is an expectation or a belief that positive things will happen. Optimism is not sustainable without hopeful action.
Although optimism can improve one’s general mood, distinguishing between what we can and cannot control and working on those aspects of life under our control will sustain a positive attitude.
False Hope
Not all hopeful actions yield results. This crazy pandemic which doesn’t quit has given us many examples of false hope. Instead of getting vaccinated, large numbers of people bought into the snake oil promises of so-called “wonder drugs” such as hydrozychloroquine and invermectin. Some believed they could outsmart the virus with herbal or dietary supplements. Tragedy can result when we follow false prophets.
Psychologist and author Susan David has recounted the tragic death of her father who succumbed to cancer at the age of 42. Shortly before his death, Dr. David’s father was led to believe that only a positive attitude and faith could cure him. In desperation, he canceled his life insurance policy which he thought demonstrated a lack of faith. In addition to grieving their loss, the family was left destitute after his death.
The Balancing Act
Oncologists often walk a fine line between encouraging their patients to have hope and providing them a realistic picture of their situation. In his book, The Anatomy of Hope, oncologist Jerome Groopman explains that hope doesn’t require positive thinking nor filtering news through rose-colored glasses. Hope acknowledges challenges but gives us courage to tackle these challenges.
A client, who has become a friend, is preparing for his death. Although he was told he wouldn’t live long after his cancer became untreatable, he has survived almost a year longer than predicted. In addition to following the regimes his medical providers recommended, he has also prepared himself for the inevitable. He’s gotten his financial affairs in order and he’s gotten his emotional affairs in order.
When our desire is to effect social change, or to make personal changes, or to die peacefully, we must resist the temptation to lapse into hopelessness. The odds may be against us for experiencing the outcome we imagined in the time frame we’d like, but we have the capacity of holding multiple, seemingly-contradictory truths. Some call this wisdom.
One truth is that we all face challenges and sometimes those challenges are extreme. The other truth is that anything is possible (even an attitude shift) if we persist and use setbacks to regroup and propel us forward.
“Hope is that thing inside us that insists, despite all evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us if we have the courage to reach for it and to work for it and to fight for it.”
Barack Obama